It was very early Monday morning. One or so when Richard woke me up. I had gone to bed as I had an early start at work… He was sobbing, and told me he was going to take Chanel to the vet. He said he had to take him, even though he thought it was too late, or something like that. He was difficult to understand as he rushed out of the room. I called work and left a voicemail that I’d probably be late or missing that day and tried to go back to sleep. I woke again at 6:30 and found Richard sleeping on the couch. He was a mess and clearly hadn’t slept at all. I tried to call work again to confirm that I would not be in. There was no answer. Oh well. I had already left a message. I got Richard to come up to bed and stayed there with him as he sobbed for a while. I had no idea at this point whether the cat had made it or not. After a while Richard slept a bit. But not for long. He was up again at 8. He was checking on Chanel, who was very sick but more stable. There were expensive tests to be done to figure out what was wrong. Each one was a major decision. He cried. A lot.

I finally got a hold of a real person at 8:15 to be sure work was not expecting me. I stayed with Richard all day. Sometimes holding him. Sometimes just sitting there with him as he stared at the wall. Chanel has been with Richard longer than me! The little cat was 13 years old and has been through a lot. He has always had health issues but we managed them. He was leading a pretty normal life, and was in great shape before this latest illness set in. In fact he behaved like a big kitten the last few years, since he could run and jump and play when for many years he couldn’t.

Anyway, he was to have an ultrasound in the afternoon. After that we were told we could visit, which we did. The doctor spoke to us first to discuss more tests beyond the ultrasound to find out what was going on. The ultrasound had been pretty inconclusive. After more tears (from both of us now) Richard agreed. After a bit we were able to see him. He was very sleepy from the sedatives but definitely feeling and looking more like himself. He had been severely dehydrated and after some time on the IV he appeared more normal. He recognized us and purred and head-butted Richard as best he could. He even wanted to jump off the table! We were hopeful as we left the hospital.

At about 11 last night Richard’s phone rang. My heart sunk. I heard only half of the conversation, but knew it was time to go. I gathered my wallet and keys. Richard was already waiting at the car. Saying goodbye was the hardest thing. First, I was surprised at how emotional I was. Then to see the man I love in so much pain… He hugged his cat and sobbed as they helped him along. His body was shutting down, and it was best that he be allowed to ‘go to sleep’. Richard’s cries tore my heart out.

When it was done they gave us a few minutes with him. I could plainly see that Chanel was gone. As I held onto my crushed man I reached over and covered Chanel with the blanket they had brought in. Richard cried out louder.

After a bit Richard was ready to go. I had to get him home. I went out to see what if anything they needed from us. They said we were clear to leave. As we passed through the waiting room there was an older couple. I will never forget the sympathetic pained look on the old woman as she watched Richard and clutched her husband. It was like she felt his pain.

Once at home we both cried on and off until we were able to sleep. 

tagged: sick cat pets death chanel companion loved

daniel · late morning · 8 comments · ping it

She sends the craziest things sometimes! Hung-over pumpkins? Really?

tagged: funny sick halloween pumpkins hung-over

daniel · late morning · 1 comment · ping it

It started just over a week ago. He was throwing up. Not entirely unusual, as he has had a lot of problems over the years. We don’t get too alarmed at a little cat barf. It’s par for the course. We assumed he had overeaten or something. But it kept going. He wasn’t keeping down any food at all. He stopped asking for food. So, Richard decided it was time for a trip to the doctor. We couldn’t just have a barfing cat the entire time my folks were here… Tests were done, hydration injections were administered. The bill added up. We were sent home. Diagnosis so far: Feline Pancreatitis. We were to not feed him for a few days, just give him medications. We tried. Most of the time he couldn’t keep those down. We just started giving him the tiniest amount of food. Tuna actually, since it is “easy to digest”. He had trouble with that. Sadly anything that finally stays down causes problems on the other end. Severe diarrhea. Ew, right?

The poor guy has no energy. No motivation. He’s losing weight. He doesn’t even *want* food! Worse, I have only seen him drink water twice in the last 4 days. It’s scary and sad.

Mostly sad. 

tagged: richard sick cat home chanel

daniel · mid-afternoon · 6 comments · ping it

Can it be? I’m not coughing? My head… it’s not hot? I don’t feel achey? Whaat?

Okay yesterday I felt better (at least at the start). Today I’d venture that I feel.. good! Still not 100%, you won’t find me at the gym or anything, but I do feel good today. Wow. Hopefully it’ll last this time…

Does this mean I have to not only go to work, but also stay there? Ugh. For my whole shift? Double ugh! Oh well, better than lying on the couch waiting to die. Right? 

tagged: work sick better flu couch

daniel · mid-morning · 4 comments · ping it

Blog neglect is like one of the main symptoms of the flu. Did you know that?

I have been so sick! I haven’t been this ill since the start of the year. I literally thought I was going to DIE. (Have I mentioned I am am bit of a baby when I don’t feel well?) Anyhoo, I am at least up and around today. Barely. I am still hacking and wheezing and sweaty. Ugh. At least I don’t have a temperature anymore. That was the worst, when your body tries to cook itself from inside out, I hate that the most…

Oh well, back to reality. I do have to work today. I won’t be *doing* actual work. I don’t want to get the associates sick… But I will be there. 

tagged: work blog sick reality cold ill body fever flu

daniel · late morning · 3 comments · ping it

I totally left work early today. No I didn’t sneak out, but I did leave early. A lot early. Normal people can enjoy doing that. Apparently I can’t. I knew I used to feel guilt if I left early, even if I was actually sick but I thought I might have changed. I haven’t. So when I got home and tried to take a nap (people are always talking about great naps) I of course couldn’t sleep. I have that guilty pit in my stomach. It’s really ridiculous. I should NOT feel bad. I never miss work! I have never called in sick! Ever! I am late probably more than I should be, but I stay late too… I could go on and on trying to justify this. I could. It’s the chatter in my head right now. I think I am going to let the logical side win and try to enjoy the afternoon. It’s a beautiful day. It’s so nice to be home. It’s so quiet right now. I love that, when the house is silent and the only noise is that of birds singing outside.

Now see what I did up there in that last paragraph? I went from raving-OCD-guilt-work issues right to a Mary Poppins-bird-singing thing. I love how crazy I am . Nutty as a loon, I tell you! [imagine cuckoo clock sounds now]

tagged: work day sick home nap early guilt

daniel · early afternoon · say it · ping it

Rested all day? Check. Snacks packed? Check. Extra water bottles? Check. Large Red Bull? Check.

What am I getting ready for? A late night hike? No! work. Today I am on an overnight shift. 8 till five AM. How nice does that sound? Hopefully it’ll be fun. Hopefully I won’t be feeling sick. My cough is lingering. That scares me. I am always the one prone to bronchitis. *crosses fingers* I am sure I’ll be fine. I just need to try to take it easy… On an overnight shift. Missing sleep. Crazy.

Anyhoo. Gotta go. I want to be a bit early…

tagged: work sick night late crazy overnight shift

daniel · early evening · 2 comments · ping it

I always hate going back to work after a few days off. This time, after having been feverish and medicated for most days, is a bit harder. First of all, I feel like I have been gone for a month. Secondly, I keep questioning if I am ‘well’ enough. See how the mind works? If I am still sick I can stay home.

I am not sick enough to stay home. *sigh*

tagged: work sick time home reality

daniel · at some point · 3 comments · ping it

New Year’s Eve was pretty low key for us. I was still pretty out of it with this cold/flu thing I got going on, but better. So we planned on the usual festivities. Chinese food and champagne. While Richard was out getting the food (It turned out to be soooo good! China Max!) I called my mom. Somehow it helps to talk to mom if I am not feeling well. I know, I am a baby when I am sick. But I have been housebound for like 3 days with this! Anyhoo, Richard finally got back and I was starving! Finally ready for some solid food! So we pigged out and watched movies. I had rented (do you call it renting when you don’t leave the house?) 1408 and Transformers. I enjoyed both, but I have to admit Transformers was mostly cool for the effects. Then it was time for the Ryan and Dick ball dropping. As soon as 2008 rolled in my bubbly and cold meds combo had put me to bed. Fancy night, eh? But it was cool to wake up to 2 New Years greetings from Canada in my voicemail. I love that my social circle is on an international level.

So I really wanted to write one of those deep, joy and pain New Year posts. But I can’t. 2007 has just been pretty solid. I have maintained my relationship with my amazing man. We still live in the same place, that we love. We have the same jobs. We have some terrific friends that have become like family, and gained some new friends along the way. All in all it has been a great year. I head into 2008 feeling very hopeful and happy. Happy New Year, and may 2008 bring you something great!

tagged: richard sick mom movies bed canada 2007 bubbly champagne

daniel · early afternoon · 2 comments · ping it

OMG. Where have I been? Where have YOU been? I swear, this poor blog is NE. Glec. Ted. I don’t even know what that means. Srsly, tho. I wanted to check in. Our big post-holiday Holiday Party is tomorrow. I am kinda excited, but more stressed. Also, I am totally sick. I hope it’s a cold and/or flu. So far that’s what it looks like, but I am prone to the Bronchitis. I swear I catch it if it is mentioned around me! But I am not trying to jinx anything. I have what I have. *cough*

I do hope I am not gonna still be sick for the party tho. We have some amazing people on the guest list. It would suck to be off at a friends house on the sick couch, missing the whole event. Most of the heavy work preparing was today. Tomorrow all I have to do is rest. I intend to rest. A book, a movie, whatever. You won’t pry me from the couch till it’s time to put on my face. Heh. And possibly an attitude. In fact my whole persona might just likely be totally fake. But I’ll look good. And I will be on cold meds. But I will be there. At my party. Propped up in a corner. Oblivious.

Or at my friend’s house, the one I cannot name. Propped up on his couch. With his dog. Trying to get well, but knowing it is best my germs stay with me… While everyone is at my house partying. Sad. 

tagged: work blog holiday people party sick time omg list house

daniel · the wee hours · 4 comments · ping it