...was i there?

10/14/08

Passing

It was very early Monday morning. One or so when Richard woke me up. I had gone to bed as I had an early start at work… He was sobbing, and told me he was going to take Chanel to the vet. He said he had to take him, even though he thought it was too late, or something like that. He was difficult to understand as he rushed out of the room. I called work and left a voicemail that I’d probably be late or missing that day and tried to go back to sleep. I woke again at 6:30 and found Richard sleeping on the couch. He was a mess and clearly hadn’t slept at all. I tried to call work again to confirm that I would not be in. There was no answer. Oh well. I had already left a message. I got Richard to come up to bed and stayed there with him as he sobbed for a while. I had no idea at this point whether the cat had made it or not. After a while Richard slept a bit. But not for long. He was up again at 8. He was checking on Chanel, who was very sick but more stable. There were expensive tests to be done to figure out what was wrong. Each one was a major decision. He cried. A lot.

...so then what? ›

I finally got a hold of a real person at 8:15 to be sure work was not expecting me. I stayed with Richard all day. Sometimes holding him. Sometimes just sitting there with him as he stared at the wall. Chanel has been with Richard longer than me! The little cat was 13 years old and has been through a lot. He has always had health issues but we managed them. He was leading a pretty normal life, and was in great shape before this latest illness set in. In fact he behaved like a big kitten the last few years, since he could run and jump and play when for many years he couldn’t.

Anyway, he was to have an ultrasound in the afternoon. After that we were told we could visit, which we did. The doctor spoke to us first to discuss more tests beyond the ultrasound to find out what was going on. The ultrasound had been pretty inconclusive. After more tears (from both of us now) Richard agreed. After a bit we were able to see him. He was very sleepy from the sedatives but definitely feeling and looking more like himself. He had been severely dehydrated and after some time on the IV he appeared more normal. He recognized us and purred and head-butted Richard as best he could. He even wanted to jump off the table! We were hopeful as we left the hospital.

At about 11 last night Richard’s phone rang. My heart sunk. I heard only half of the conversation, but knew it was time to go. I gathered my wallet and keys. Richard was already waiting at the car. Saying goodbye was the hardest thing. First, I was surprised at how emotional I was. Then to see the man I love in so much pain… He hugged his cat and sobbed as they helped him along. His body was shutting down, and it was best that he be allowed to ‘go to sleep’. Richard’s cries tore my heart out.

When it was done they gave us a few minutes with him. I could plainly see that Chanel was gone. As I held onto my crushed man I reached over and covered Chanel with the blanket they had brought in. Richard cried out louder.

After a bit Richard was ready to go. I had to get him home. I went out to see what if anything they needed from us. They said we were clear to leave. As we passed through the waiting room there was an older couple. I will never forget the sympathetic pained look on the old woman as she watched Richard and clutched her husband. It was like she felt his pain.

Once at home we both cried on and off until we were able to sleep.

‹ wish i hadn't asked!

tagged: sick cat pets death chanel loved companion

daniel · late morning · 8 comments · ping it

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